Take your time

Take your time to grow up... Life is full of excitement and challenges are peeking around the corner. What more could you wish for, than spend the last couple of days in London, UK? You were so excited about this school trip, that you have talked about it for months in a row. It felt kinda awkward though, to let you get on that bus to Calais, where you and your school mates would catch the train to the UK. A bus full of young children crashed in a tunnel in Switzerland, just this week. No less than 22 school children and 6 adults lost their lives. It's devastating and scary.. The whole country is mourning and the pain in our hearts is not even bearable. But life and love is about letting go. We must have faith that you will be okay. There's not going to be any accident or awful news. You will come home and tell us all about your journey abroad. That's what we promised ourselves..

Happy birthday sweetie. You turned 17 today. That seems like a very long time, but then again, it's like it was only yesterday when you entered this world. So pure, so innocent, so perfect. You have become a wonderful young lady. We love you honeybun. xx

Premonition

I have this gut feeling that Spring is starting to show its true colors. The day our chickens laid their first perfect egg of the year, brought me joy and happiness. It was smaller than the eggs they normally lay, but nevertheless, it was tasty and fresh. Daffodils are sprouting from the soil that is being warmed up by weak sunbeams. Little birds are twittering (or should I say tweeting to be hip?) their songs early in the morning, hesitant but still noticeable. That is, if you are willing to listen to them. I love this time of the year. Leaving the dark winter days behind, we can look forward to new life being born. We desperately need more sunlight. Vitamin D is so important for our well being. Our innerself needs this boost to keep going. We lack so much sun in our country, that our oldest daughter keeps saying she will move abroad.

I'm on the look out for Mary and her little lamb. I love Spring. Everything is so new and fresh and hopeful. The sun will brighten our mood and warm our hearts. You're more than welcome, my most favorite season of all.

Don't worry about a thing

This is what I would like to say: don't worry about a thing.. but I'm taking some time off from this blog. No particular reason. I'll be back before you know it.

I know your ways

You and I are so much alike... we have similar features and our humor is not always to be understood by others. My little girl looks after me and in that knowledge she looks after you too. It was good to hug you and kiss your cheeks and tell you how much you are loved. You are very special to me. Good days or bad days, you have always welcomed me into your home. Driving home from highschool, I would stop by your house first. There was always a hot cup of tea for me and you were anxious to hear about my week. It felt like coming home..

I'm so proud of you. When you told me your HbA1c had dropped to this very acceptable 5.4%, my heart got filled with pride. There is not one day you don't go outside to take a brisk walk. It's paying off. Following the guidelines of your endocrinologist and dietitian, you are doing so much better than a couple of years before. We talked about your mom today. How she died at the age of 58. The exact age you are now. Can't imagine what it would feel like to lose you. Having chosen you as the godmother of our oldest daughter, you will always have a special place in our hearts. I see how you look at my children with deep love and interest. You ask them about school, their friends and their special friends. You enjoy their stories and you love to cuddle us. That's what moms do.. and that's what you are to me: my own mammie... xxx

Obviously

We all have our flaws and our limitations in life. It's interesting to find out what ours are.

I have two sisters-in-law who are very interested in living a healthy life. They work out, eat healthy food and are working on their innerself as well. They don't live their healthy lifestyle to loose weight, no. They don't even need to loose weight. They are convinced that eating healthy food will nourish their body the way it's supposed to be nourished. It's interesting to share opinions and recipes.
One sister-in-law is eating low carb and it's paying off. She feels so much better since she eats more veggies and less carbs. No more stomach troubles and plenty of energy.
The other sister-in-law is taking it even a step higher. She even works in a company that produces and distributes vegetarian produce. After her working hours, she goes to evening classes to become a health consultant. She's doing real well and living healthy is beneficial to her.
I learn a lot from both ladies. Thank you for sharing your wisdom with me!

Rise and shine

It could be my motto in life: rise and shine. I like positive thinking and I like to move on. Life is too short to dwell over missed opportunities or unhappiness. Does that mean I'm always chipper and exuberant? Don't I have any off days, where I would love to stay in bed and not budge an inch?  I do.. trust me, I do.

Lately, I've had several conversations on this subject, with as many people. Friends who are close to me, know me better than that. They know I'm not always that outrageous and joyful. Just like the rest of you, I have my weak moments. I dislike those weak moments though.
I don't like the sun hiding behind dark clouds. Bright sunlight has my preference over cloudy, rainy days. People are counting on me. I'm good at cheering up others and it fills my heart to pay others a visit if they are in need. But who keeps me safe?
Where's my shoulder to lean on? That's when this difficult question pops up: do I allow myself to fall apart and cry my heart out..? I think not. I'm afraid I won't be able to crawl back up if I do. We should all have a shoulder to cry on. Ever heard the song: Cry me a river? If you have, you will know where I'm headed to.

There are plenty of friends who will lend me their shoulder. There are good friends who will catch me whenever I might trip. I have a couple of phone numbers I can call at any time, even in the middle of the night. That's a comforting thought, although I doubt I would ever dial those numbers. I don't want to be a burden to anyone. You can come and tell me about your troubles in life and I'll give you a hug and a reassuring tap on the shoulder. It's more than okay to let me know how you feel. If only I could be my own best friend, it would make things a whole lot easier. If only I could sleep a bit more... I'm tired..

Nothing new under the moon

Things are going the way they are going. Nothing spectacular happening. Just the usual daily household, you know what it's like. No real excitement. A bit of cleaning, some dusting, maybe some baking as a distraction. There are no particular outings planned or excitement to look forward to. Just me and the dogs, at home, relaxing and getting some chores done. Life can't always be as exciting, right?

Il y a vraiment du metier ici

It won't come as a surprise, if I tell you that I love to cook. Not just the cooking part, but reading recipes, tracking down special ingredients, making preparations in the kitchen, thinking about a logic menu choice.. it's all part of the fun. Imagine my happiness, when being in 's Hertogenbosch, Holland, we visited a cookshop and I ran in to this product I had last bought on the Net. It was a bottle of true vanilla bean paste and it's nearly impossible to find around here. The product is being imported from the exotic Madagascar. I was happy as a child around Christmas with my bottle of vanilla bean paste. I will treasure it and use it sparely.

Seeing that pumpkin and a container of ricotta in my fridge, I decided to make some more ravioli. Coloring the pasta dough with saffran, it came out beautifully well. It would definitely match with the orange filling. The ravioli's are to be cooked first, before you fry them in a shallow pan in a bit of browned butter. Add plenty of freshly grated nutmeg and serve with Parmesan cheese on the side. What a fulfilling task that was. I'm proud of me. I'm proud of what I do and the food I serve. It fills me with joy to see how well the result was. I have put a lot of effort in it and it was worth it.

I struggle to understand

It was nice to shake hands and be welcomed into your office. You were friendly and we had some small talk before I popped my question. You were happy with my HbA1C, that has been lower than 7% for the last 1.5 year. I'm happy with my number too, but I worry about the standard deviation. Having a blood glucose of 45 and one of 450 in one day, is not exactly motivating. It wears you out and you feel like crap. The problem is: I have too many fluctuations in my blood glucose. There's this one book I like to follow, when it comes to diabetes treatment and that is Pumping Insulin. A standard deviation of 50 or lower, helps you prevent complications in later life. Think kidney failure, blindness, amputations of limbs. I'm an optimist, I really am, but when it comes to complications, I'd rather prevent than treat them.

You understood my question about CGM. I told you about my black out in the beginning of February. Yes, I know that is not hypo unawareness. And no, I'm not pregnant. Because those reasons are more or less acceptable if you want to apply for CGM. I do have several low blood glucose numbers a day and sometimes I don't sense them, ending up in trouble. CGM would help me prevent that. You get warned that your blood glucose is dropping rapidly or getting way out of line.

You said you wanted to discuss my application with your colleagues. That's a good idea, I assume. We'll have another get together in April. In the meantime, I'll poke my fingers 10 times a day, like so many of my friends do..

Let's call it a date

I set this date just three weeks ago. Because I definitely wanted to see him. Our next date was too far off and I needed a good conversation. It couldn't wait till May, so I scheduled a new date.

He's tall and blond and Dutch. Absolutely not the kind of man I would date. He's my endocrinologist. And what I'm gonna ask him today, will be a tough question. I would really like to convince him of the profits CGM (Continuous Glucose Monitoring) could bring me. I have my eyes set on the Dexcom sensor, in combination with my Accu-Chek Combo insulin pump. I hope he will have time to hear me out. He's a good doctor and we get along. CGM is still at own expense and since it is very expensive, I'm looking for a way to get it reimbursed after all. And I'm getting there... if only the CGM is prescribed by my physician. So Please Doctor R.. try to reason with me and help me get through to the doctor who's investigating my medical file. It would be the present of the year..