Wednesday, November 18, 2009

Making life worthwile again

I stayed in bed this morning. I wanted to sleep. I didn't want to think. I wanted to doze off and dream my dreams. Life isn't always what it seems.
I guess I'm not having a great time at the moment. I hate the end of the year. I don't like the cold weather, the darkness of winter, Christmas. Bad memories. Not the most pleasant time of the year for me.
I'm always glad I have good friends to rely on. People that understand and care. People that don't give up on me and stand by my side. People that are there for me, unconditionally. But it's just not good enough this time. I want to stick my head under the covers and go back to sleep. I would like to hibernate... and not come back until things have gone better. I hate to feel the way I feel. But I can't deny my feelings, can I? No one is to blame but me. Trust me. I'm not blaming anyone for the way I feel. And it's my own responsibility to overcome this discomfort I'm feeling. Nevertheless, it's good to have some back up to save me from drowning..
I think I'm gonna have some chocolate mousse. Quite a bit.


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