Sunday, May 6, 2012

It's all about making choices in life

From the day we are born, our parents have a plan in mind for our future. Sometimes we are still in the womb, when discussions are being held about universities or possible marriage candidates. As parents, we have an idea of how our children should lead their lives. We dream about their childhood, their puberty and their lives as young adults. We silently imagine what our grandchildren will look like or where their homes will be built. Plans are being forged and our imagination goes wild. All of that with the best intentions, but without consulting our children.. even with the knowledge that after all, it is their life they are going to lead, we make decisions for them. We pick out their schools, decide what friends can come over to our house and what friends need to be ignored. We enjoy to surprise them with a new set of clothes and get upset if they don't like our taste..

The children grow up and we get older. We teach them to have a voice and speak up for themselves. But are we that broad minded if they use that voice against us? Do we force our opinions to be the one and only way? As in: my way or the highway? Or do we grant our children the opportunity to make their own choices in life? Sometimes we know better - or at least we "think" we know better. But if we listen well, those same children can come up with solutions we had never thought of. Solutions and ideas worth listening to. Why is it so difficult for parents to admit that their opinion is not always the best? After all, we do want our children to grow up and be happy and live a fulfilling life. We want them to make good choices in life. How else can they learn if we don't let them try things out and make mistakes for their own? It's the best school.. It will help them make good decisions in later life, for they have had the chance to learn as young adults. It's worth the try. Really.

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