I was sitting outside after lunch, enjoying a small bowl of home made strawberry ice cream. The deck is vibrant with pots of flowers, that are seen from the corner of my eye. A little finch is sitting on the side of the BBQ, singing a hesitant song. I like to watch the birdy while I'm typing this blog. The sun is making my screen shiny and it's hard to see what I'm writing. The dogs are in their bed, next to me, sleeping - as usual. Arthur is sunbathing on one of the sunbeds we pulled out of the shed yesterday. I'm thinking about my husband, who left for work this morning around 5:00 AM. I'm sure he would like to sit outside too.. I could hand him a cool glass of Chardonnay and make him some bruschetta. He would sit in one of the chairs, his eyes closed and the crow's feet around his eyes would show. He would lean back, his legs stretched. Maybe he would take of his shirt to feel the sunbeams on his chest. I would look at him and be happy he were home.
Is it decadent, to sit outside in the sun, while others are zealous and working? I don't know. Maybe.. Do I feel guilty? Yes, somehow I do. Don't know why. Maybe because it's socially not accepted to be relaxing while there are chores to be done. I have made my preparations for dinner this morning. I have hoovered the house and fed the animals, made strawberry ice cream for dessert and I've put away the dishes. The bed has been given fresh linen and I have bought the groceries we needed for the upcoming days. There are two baskets of clothes that are crying to be ironed. They won't go away. I could do them tonight, you know. After sunset.. if I feel like it. Otherwise, I'll do it tomorrow, or even next week. There's no boss telling me what needs to be done. I have a to do list, but it's my own private list. Nobody present to supervise my list or comment my zeal. I don't envy my working friends. I'm not jealous of their paycheck, their colleagues, their way of life. After all, it's a choice everyone should be able to make. It was my choice to work no more than 12 hours a week. I don't mind being a housewife. I'm not the best maid, but are all working people the best possible staff? I'm not jealous of zealous people. They shouldn't be jealous of me either..