Last week I went to visit a friend, who used to be my French teacher. We are from the same region by origin and there is something that keeps the friendship going, although we don't see each other that often. She has a wonderful orchard and I was invited to pick fresh cherries and red currants, while she was picking fresh greens for our lunch. She's a coach to many people and she always has good advice. I like to talk to her and broaden my mind. It's not the first time we talked about work and making money. It's not that I don't want to work or earn money, honestly. I think something is holding me back. I don't have a good relationship with money. That is, money is not that important to me anymore. It's a bit hard to explain. I like to spend money and it feels good to have (plastic) money in your pocket. I think it's the fear of having money to my own name. I don't have good experiences with money in my own account. It can be taken away from you. Maybe that's the main reason why I spend money so easily and don't mind working without being paid?
I'm ready to leave those experiences behind me and move on. I want to make money of my own. I want to contribute more to our savings account and I want my husband to be proud of me. I'm looking into finding ways to earn some extra money. I've been to a meeting this week, to learn more about one particular job I could combine with my love for cooking. I won't rush things this time. I will think things over as long as it takes. I already have an income and a job. This is extra, on the side. I will get there, just give me the time I need.
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