Shout

I am trying to figure out why I'm so allergic to shouting people. I just can't stand it when people shout at me or at someone else, especially children. What's the use? It's scary, in fact it may be pretty frightening for a child to be yelled at. As a reaction, the child yells back and then the yelling goes back and forth. It's damaging. Absolutely. It comes to a point where the child will no longer respond to the shouting noise. They won't hear it anymore, because they have become so used to it. It makes them numb.

I used to have a co-worker that would shout at me whenever she thought I did something wrong. It made me real small and I felt humiliated to be shouted at in front of my colleagues. She reminded me of my mother. I couldn't stand up for myself, not at work and not at home. It was painful to see, that people with a higher position could call me names and treat me bad. That's when I decided this had to stop. I did not intend to remain the little child that crawled in a corner of the room because it couldn't defend itself.

So I became more assertive. It's hard work and it takes a lot of practise. But it pays off. I haven't been shouted at for quite a while. And if someone tries to call me names, I tell them in a quiet voice I don't appreciate being cursed at. Most of the time that's sufficient.